I went to Nokia Care Center in V.I. the other day to fix the screen of my E90. Took a ticket and waited patiently like a jobless dude. I've never been there before. It looks cool. Gives you this feeling of “come unto me all ye whose phone has heavily laden you and we will give you rest……. for a fee if need be” If I had known about that office, my 5300 would've been given Lazarus' chance of life.
The line got to me, I got charged N6600 for the screen. I haven't even paid yet.
There was this dude beside me with a stentorian voice. His voice is the ideal hi-tech futuristic weapon when compared to the primitive trumpets used to bring down walls of Jericho. Dude came to buy a battery for his phone.
Boom Voice: How much do you sell battery for this phone?
Nokia Staff: It's N8,800 sir.
Boom Voice: What?! No check again.
The nokia care center representatives (all girls though) started giggling sheepishly amongst themselves sensing that the poor guy couldn't believe it's that expensive. Of course his tone of voice, look on his face and gesture was glaring even the blind could see his astonishment which he made no attempt to mask.
Boom Voice: Why I'm asking is that I bought this phone N8000, howcome the battery is N8,800?
Instantly a roaring laughter rocked the room, ripping apart the serenity of the vicinity. The laughter held sway for a long time. The punch line was nicely delivered. Ironically this guy's tragedy gave us comedy overload. Trust me that dose laugh cures HBP permanently.
Nokia Staff: Sir we don't sell fake batteries, the least of our batteries is N6000.
I was like, what's the least of your phones? Quickly she replied they don't sell phones. The dude was disappointed big time. "How can I buy a phone for N8,000 and the battery alone costs N8,800? Its better I buy a new phone then" You can imagine that. Even if he bought his phone from the greyest quarters of grey market, it can never sell up to N12,000 in a nokia authorized store. The dude just walked away obviously he went to the wrong place like going to Iraq looking for statue of liberty.
I almost bought a battery for N6000 from the nokia store at The Palms Mall sometime ago. Lucky I didn't cuz the phone's problem was not even battery.
Another exotic looking chick presented her E90 for repairs. Only God knows the star high figure they told her but like boom voice, she was very vocal when she said "Let Me Go And See Those Igbo Boys" and she stormed out of the office. Igbo boys to the rescue. I expected a chick with those looks to be equal to the task. Igbo Boys do make miracles and magic depending on what you want. I guess the yoruba boom voice should do the same. Go see the IGBO boys!
By the way, I"M PROUDLY IBO!
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Counting On You
This is something from the archive. A letter I wrote to my elder cousin when I got bored sitting at home after my graduation. Sent via email on Monday 28 June 2004.
Counting On You
Hello Dear Dee Ugo, warmest greetings to you
Hope it's all good with you and around you
By His grace we are just getting through
l pray that we all get the best from what we do
The project is no longer a task it has been tidied-up
Our results are not yet out they still have to toss it up
That don't faze me, l won't make it a storm in a teacup
l'm bothered about doing nothing, l have to at least sup
Most people think l should rest all day having achieved one goal
That after the school stress that l now relax body and soul
But on the flip side l'm wasting in this somewhat hell-hole
Desire for achievement is in flux l need to play a lucrative role
My completion of school was greeted with a lot of fanfare
l basked in it for a while and somehow it kinda ended there
What l hoped for seemed shattered like an unlucky chinaware
Honestly right about now l'm just neck-deep in despair
Now l don't have options in my arsenal l only have last hope
l'm counting on you as pis aller hoping you will be able to cope
No language will ever explain my exact state if you say nope
lt's not an order, it's just a request within the humility scope
Ooops let me hurriedly click on send before
l run out of time l can't afford to pay for more
Time cuz l'm broke, all the regards in my store
ls what l'm sending, this is where l'll quit the floor
Nwabueze
Counting On You
Hello Dear Dee Ugo, warmest greetings to you
Hope it's all good with you and around you
By His grace we are just getting through
l pray that we all get the best from what we do
The project is no longer a task it has been tidied-up
Our results are not yet out they still have to toss it up
That don't faze me, l won't make it a storm in a teacup
l'm bothered about doing nothing, l have to at least sup
Most people think l should rest all day having achieved one goal
That after the school stress that l now relax body and soul
But on the flip side l'm wasting in this somewhat hell-hole
Desire for achievement is in flux l need to play a lucrative role
My completion of school was greeted with a lot of fanfare
l basked in it for a while and somehow it kinda ended there
What l hoped for seemed shattered like an unlucky chinaware
Honestly right about now l'm just neck-deep in despair
Now l don't have options in my arsenal l only have last hope
l'm counting on you as pis aller hoping you will be able to cope
No language will ever explain my exact state if you say nope
lt's not an order, it's just a request within the humility scope
Ooops let me hurriedly click on send before
l run out of time l can't afford to pay for more
Time cuz l'm broke, all the regards in my store
ls what l'm sending, this is where l'll quit the floor
Nwabueze
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